It’s been MONTHS! We’re finally here! It’s time to talk about the first election oh yeah! The first interesting thing I notice about this election is that it was equally as crazy as every other election has been.

This tells me that from the very beginning every single presidential election has sparked insane made-up conspiracy theories and fake news up the wazoo. I mean sure, propaganda is an ancient art, but I wasn’t expecting the election nonsense and shenanigans to start SO SOON ya’know? But nope. It’s precedent… Or is it? Maybe I’ll be proven wrong next time… or the time after that… maybe…

ANYWAYS I’M GONNA TELL YA WHO WON NOW!

Winner: George Washington

Chicken Dinner: John Adams